Sunday, April 26, 2009

i realised i haven't blogged for a long time.
hmmm i just read sujun's blog and got an inspiration because it's so reflective, i wonder if i can be like this too.
reflecting on life these days, it seems like i do quite a bit of things but i find that the meaning isn't really that much. all i do is work, give tuition, and go out with friends on weekends. and the purpose? earning money, keeping in contact with friends, when in the past studying was for my future. but i guess this would be for a short period of time. so what am i reflecting about in the first place. i don't want people to think that i make empty promises, like say i'll see them soon, meet them soon, when so much time has passed and yet i haven't met them at all. there's this friend i haven't met since feb 14 and i still haven't arranged a day yet. and it's not that i don't want to.
and i suppose i should make some changes to myself, such as, being more confident, less lazy, more filial, more considerate, more grateful..the list goes on but i guess these cannot change overnight. i will be trying, hard as it may seem.
my mum always says that i do many things for my friends, but yet when it comes to family i'm less ____(what is a word for it?nice?). but i feel that it's not the case. hmm i find that in the case of family, we tend to take them for granted, thinking that they'd always be there. but i've been trying. at our age i feel that it's normal that we prefer to hang out with our friends rather than stay at home (sujun agrees too). but i dislike the fact that people misunderstand me. the fact that people can think so badly of me and everything only shows that they don't know me, which i am so disappointed. but it has happened quite some time ago so i should forget about it. i don't wish to hear anymore of those, you treat your friends so well and yada yada...
apart from those, life has been reasonably good(: met company this week on monday and friday((: and it was enjoyable! i really missed seeing them. and watched 17again with ship and steph which was good:D and on sat i went rockclimbing with sujun and steph, which we spent more time talking rather than climb hahaha sujun sorry i was so timid. and i got dbsk's secret code too!:D which is good the dvd is awesome though there're no subs.

and i'll end with a song i'm in love with- xiah junsu (lately)

Lately, I have had the strangest feeling
With no vivid reason here to find
Yet the thought of losing you's been
hanging 'round my mind

Far more frequently
you're wearing perfume
With you say no special place to go
But when I ask will you be coming back soon
You don't know, never know

Well, I'm a man of many wishes
Hope my premonition misses
But what I really feel my eyes won't let me hide
Cause they always start to cry
Cause this time could mean goodbye

Lately I've been staring in the mirror
Very slowly picking me apart
Trying to tell myself
I have no reason with your heart

Just the other night while you were sleeping
I vaguely heard you whisper someone's name
But when I ask you of the thoughts your keeping
You just say nothing's changed

Well, I'm a man of many wishes
I hope my premonition misses
But what I really feel my eyes won't let me hide
Cause they always start to cry
Cause this time could mean goodbye, goodbye

Oh, I'm a man of many wishes
I hope my premonition misses
But what I really feel my eyes won't let me hide
Cause they always start to cry
Cause this time could mean goodbye