It has been so long since I've posted.
Older, (maybe) wiser, happier.
2016
1. Subscriptions
Never really believed in subscriptions of sorts, but I made two subscriptions this year. One for Apple Music and the other for iBethel.tv. The one I pondered over the most was the iBetheltv subscription, because it was USD$96 for a year, and I was doing fine using the free media. But I went ahead with it anyway because I knew I wouldn't regret it. It was a treasure trove of sermons and worship sessions. Looking forward to more soaking sessions, and more uses of my Macbook Pro then.
2. Leading Praise and Worship at LG
This was something I did more of this year. Not that many times yet and I'm still always nervous when I lead, but I've learnt to enjoy the process and follow where God is leading. After all, it is not about me but all about Him and drawing others to Him.
Sunday, January 01, 2017
Wednesday, December 10, 2014
SCMS 2014
Truly, unprepared would be a great understatement for this run. Well, not that I have ever been prepared for anything at all. But after the Great Eastern run on 9th November, I couldn't forget that pain that I experienced towards the end and at the end of the 21.1km. In a way I was more afraid for SCMS than GEWR since I had already been through it once and knew how it would feel. Adding on the fact that I would be going for it alone, I was quite a bundle of nerves the night before really! It did not help that I had to miss service to get sufficient rest. Many times I had exclaimed that I regretted signing up for 21.1km because I had no idea how I would complete it. But I had to complete it (that is a given since I already registered but it was sponsored so all the more I could not back out of it had I wanted to).
Attempting a flatlay on my bed the night before. I was pondering over the need to wear shorts over my tights but decided against it for fear that it'd be too warm.
Breakfast of bagel with laughing cow cheese prepared by my mum which tasted oh so good.
On the MRT at 4am when my flag off time was at 6:30am all because I didn't know how to get to Sentosa Gateway and was intending to follow other people. Yet all the people I saw on the MRT were full marathon runners, hence I decided to hide my purple bib identifying myself as a half marathon participant. #noobstatus Boo my purple bib still peeked out despite my feeble attempt.
Baggage deposit was a breeze and I headed off to the starting point. My legs were feeling so heavy at this point I didn't know how I was going to run at all.
Never been so early before.
Got a photo taken at the start point which I totally didn't expect because I didn't dare to ask anyone to help me take, but since someone asked me to help, I asked for a favour in return. Wasn't even 6am yet so I had lots of time to kill. Prayed a prayer of strength and protection while doing stretching. Soon the crowd came and the start pen was packed. Wasn't exactly feeling thrilled considering that I didn't feel like I could run but I tried to jump and stretch more before the air horn was sounded. I was so totally caught unaware by the slopes at the starting point. It was seriously a lot compared to the smooth and flat ground I was used to running previously. My knees were so weak! It felt like a long time before I reached the 1km mark and I really didn't think I could do it. In my mind I thought 'Okay 20 more to go.' But as I went on, I started to enjoy the run. Managed to regulate my breathing and I ran at a more constant pace. I didn't have a watch so I didn't keep track of the time until I passed the expressway where there was a clock.
My mood was instantly lifted when I entered USS. It was my first time in USS and I never imagined my first visit to be during a run. It was so fun to see the mascots but I didn't stop to take any photos though. My agenda was still to quickly finish. I think it was around the 6 or 7 km mark at that point. I still had a long way to go! Soon we entered the basement car park and I'm not sure why but I felt a little breathless while running through it. Then it was time to exit Sentosa and hit the highway. It was 10km by then. Grabbed two gels to take along the way. By that time the sun was out and all I was doing was to look out for the next distance marker as well as hydration points. I wouldn't have been able to run at all had my mind been on the run throughout. My mind was filled with songs of worship such as 'Every act of love', 'How great is our God' and many others that I cannot remember now. I prayed at some points, like what my leader did when he went for runs. Before my run I prayed for God to speak to me during the run and He told me to show acts of love. There were so many times in which I wanted to encourage another runner but had no courage to. I guess this is something I will have to work on in future.
I never thought much of 10km medals because I knew it was doable for me, but 21.1km medals are really precious to me and hold so much meaning.
Got a photo taken at the start point which I totally didn't expect because I didn't dare to ask anyone to help me take, but since someone asked me to help, I asked for a favour in return. Wasn't even 6am yet so I had lots of time to kill. Prayed a prayer of strength and protection while doing stretching. Soon the crowd came and the start pen was packed. Wasn't exactly feeling thrilled considering that I didn't feel like I could run but I tried to jump and stretch more before the air horn was sounded. I was so totally caught unaware by the slopes at the starting point. It was seriously a lot compared to the smooth and flat ground I was used to running previously. My knees were so weak! It felt like a long time before I reached the 1km mark and I really didn't think I could do it. In my mind I thought 'Okay 20 more to go.' But as I went on, I started to enjoy the run. Managed to regulate my breathing and I ran at a more constant pace. I didn't have a watch so I didn't keep track of the time until I passed the expressway where there was a clock.
My mood was instantly lifted when I entered USS. It was my first time in USS and I never imagined my first visit to be during a run. It was so fun to see the mascots but I didn't stop to take any photos though. My agenda was still to quickly finish. I think it was around the 6 or 7 km mark at that point. I still had a long way to go! Soon we entered the basement car park and I'm not sure why but I felt a little breathless while running through it. Then it was time to exit Sentosa and hit the highway. It was 10km by then. Grabbed two gels to take along the way. By that time the sun was out and all I was doing was to look out for the next distance marker as well as hydration points. I wouldn't have been able to run at all had my mind been on the run throughout. My mind was filled with songs of worship such as 'Every act of love', 'How great is our God' and many others that I cannot remember now. I prayed at some points, like what my leader did when he went for runs. Before my run I prayed for God to speak to me during the run and He told me to show acts of love. There were so many times in which I wanted to encourage another runner but had no courage to. I guess this is something I will have to work on in future.
Happiness upon reaching this sign! Just 2km more to go. The last few km before this was made difficult because of the sun. I don't think I have ever ran for prolonged periods in the sun before so that was something new. Tried to keep my spirits up and finish it well. I was trying to finish the run under 3 hours but I only managed a 3:05:18. I will just have to keep training well. I thank God for bringing me through and sustaining me throughout the run. Without Him I wouldn't have even completed it.
I never thought much of 10km medals because I knew it was doable for me, but 21.1km medals are really precious to me and hold so much meaning.
Walked super far to the floating platform to collect my belongings and then it was time to head home. Always something to be learnt from each run and during this run I learnt to rely on God. I may have been alone throughout but I never once felt lonely.
No two runs are ever the same even if they are of the same route. What more of a different route. I really enjoyed this run, with the scenic view and fewer loops.
Till the next run then! So happy to have ended the last run of the year well.
Saturday, November 08, 2014
Finding myself here when I'm supposed to be doing some reading. Or at least I had intended to. Sometimes I find myself overwhelmed by technology. Where replies are expected to be quick and instant. I don't like that. I admit that sometimes, I am guilty of it too. When things are urgent and I see that 'two ticks' in Whatsapp, I expect the other party to reply me immediately. Gone are the days of sending a text message of 160 characters, where I would try to use up as many characters as possible so as to make the most of it. Often carefully thought through before sending. No, it's all gone now. People (we) send one word replies, one alphabet replies.
Most of all, what I really dislike is being caught in the middle. Does anyone have the same dilemma? Like how I ask someone who needs some expertise which I know someone else who has it. And then it becomes my responsibility to contact the other party. And not forgetting that the one in need already has many options. Then now I get caught in between. This is when I would so gladly wash my hands off this matter, or wish that I hadn't offered in the first place. Stop being so big-mouthed, Sam.
I'm in the midst of a transition. Back then before I started this transition, I already knew how hard and painful it would be, yet I told myself that this was necessary. I couldn't go on like how I did previously. To give an analogy, it would be getting a new job and informing the colleagues of my impending move. Awkward and all. Feeling like I betrayed all of them by wanting to leave whenever I see them, and the only difference would be that I will still be seeing the people I feel that I betrayed, for a long long time. And this is not the worst part yet. It has yet to come because I haven't told the people whom I have been staying the longest time for about my leaving. I can only imagine the looks on their faces when they see it.
Don't know what point I'm trying to put across with this verbal diarrhoea really. Perhaps its jitters before my first 21.1km run, perhaps it's sudden reflections.
It sounds like an impending stormy rainy night is near.
I've been finding comfort in food lately, which explains by recent or gradual weight gain. I can't say I didn't see it coming, but somehow I tend to overeat my favourite nuts. I need to re-gain the self-control I had over my diet 2 years ago. Two years ago, I bought tops that were 15" in ptp without a thought but now I need to consider whether I will be able to fit into them. Skirts measuring 13" in waist were loose on me and now they feel more fitting and I wear them higher. My arms are bigger too. It's time to take control again, before it's too late.
Most of all, what I really dislike is being caught in the middle. Does anyone have the same dilemma? Like how I ask someone who needs some expertise which I know someone else who has it. And then it becomes my responsibility to contact the other party. And not forgetting that the one in need already has many options. Then now I get caught in between. This is when I would so gladly wash my hands off this matter, or wish that I hadn't offered in the first place. Stop being so big-mouthed, Sam.
I'm in the midst of a transition. Back then before I started this transition, I already knew how hard and painful it would be, yet I told myself that this was necessary. I couldn't go on like how I did previously. To give an analogy, it would be getting a new job and informing the colleagues of my impending move. Awkward and all. Feeling like I betrayed all of them by wanting to leave whenever I see them, and the only difference would be that I will still be seeing the people I feel that I betrayed, for a long long time. And this is not the worst part yet. It has yet to come because I haven't told the people whom I have been staying the longest time for about my leaving. I can only imagine the looks on their faces when they see it.
Don't know what point I'm trying to put across with this verbal diarrhoea really. Perhaps its jitters before my first 21.1km run, perhaps it's sudden reflections.
It sounds like an impending stormy rainy night is near.
I've been finding comfort in food lately, which explains by recent or gradual weight gain. I can't say I didn't see it coming, but somehow I tend to overeat my favourite nuts. I need to re-gain the self-control I had over my diet 2 years ago. Two years ago, I bought tops that were 15" in ptp without a thought but now I need to consider whether I will be able to fit into them. Skirts measuring 13" in waist were loose on me and now they feel more fitting and I wear them higher. My arms are bigger too. It's time to take control again, before it's too late.
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